01. 人生的最大遗憾莫过于错误地坚持了不该坚持的，轻易地放弃了不该放弃的……
The most regret ion of live is insist on something that shouldn’t be insisted on, give up something that shouldn’t be given up
02. 大师兄，你知道吗?二师兄的肉现在比师傅的都贵了。
Tang Monk/Tang Priest, don’t you know piggy is more valuable than you? (The Pilgrimage to the West)
03. 怀才就像怀孕，时间长了才能看出来。
Having knowledge likes having pregnant, it takes times to be awareness.
04. 还能冲动，表示你还对生活有激情，总是冲动，表示你还不懂生活。If you acts on impulse, you have passions in life, if you always acts on impulse, you don’t know what life is.
05. 我问一个在深圳工作了二十年的朋友：“如果你死后，你的墓志铭打算写点啥?”他说：“我解决了住房问题!”
I asked a question to a friend who has been working in Shenzhen for 20 years, what would be the proudest things in your life if you died?
He said: I have already pay back the mortgage loan of my
06. 妈妈说人最好不要错过两样东西，最后一班回家的车和一个深爱你的人。Mom said you’d better not miss two things , the last bus to home and the person who loves you deeply.
07. 一天看到一位大妈在烧纸，边烧边嘟囔着：收到了全都买基金吧~~One day I saw a old woman was burning paper money and
mumbled : buy funds if you get it.
08. 好的爱情是你透过一个男人看到世界，坏的爱情是你为了一个人舍弃世界……
A good love is you find the world for a man; a bad love is you abandon the world for a man.
09. 诸葛亮出山前，也没带过兵!凭啥我就要工作经验?
Before Liang Zhuge coming out, he didnt have experience in leading the army! why i should have experience when look for a job?
10. 如果你看到面前的阴影，别怕，那是因为你的背后有阳光……
If you saw the dark in front of you, dont be afriad, that's because sunshine is at your back.
钞票不是万能的，有时还需要信用卡。
2)Oneshouldloveanimals.Theyaresotasty.
每个人都应该热爱动物，因为它们很好吃。
3)Savewater.Showerwithyourgirlfriend.要节约用水，尽量和女友一起洗澡。
4)Lovetheneighbor.Butdon?tgetcaught.
要用心去爱你的邻居，不过不要让她的老公知道。
5)Behindeverysuccessfulman,thereisawoman.Andbehindeveryunsuccessfulman,therearetwo.每个成功男人的背后，都有一个女人。每个不成功男人的背后，都有两个女人。
6)Everymanshouldmarry.Afterall,happinessisnottheonlythinginlife.
再快乐的单身汉迟早也会结婚，幸福不是永久的嘛。
7)Thewisenevermarry,Andwhentheymarrytheybecomeotherwise.
聪明人都是未婚的，结婚的人很难再聪明起来。
8)Successisarelativeterm.Itbringssomanyrelatives.
成功是一个相关名词，他会给你带来很多不相关的亲戚（联系）。
9)Neverputofftheworktilltomorrowwhatyoucanputofftoday.
不要等明天交不上差再找借口，今天就要找好。
10)Loveisphotogenic.Itneedsdarknesstodevelop.
爱情就象照片，需要大量的暗房时间来培养。（老外也保守，要摸黑办事，哈哈）
11)Childreninbackseatscauseaccidents.Accidentsinbackseatscausechildren.后排座位上的小孩会生出意外，后排座位上的意外会生出小孩。
12)"Yourfuturedependsonyourdreams."Sogotosleep."
现在的梦想决定着你的将来"，所以还是再睡一会吧。
13)Thereshouldbeabetterwaytostartadaythanwakingupeverymorning.
应该有更好的方式开始新一天，而不是千篇一律的在每个上午都醒来。
14)"Hardworkneverkilledanybody."Butwhytaketherisk?"
"努力工作不会导致死亡！"不过我不会用自己去证明。
15)"Workfascinatesme."Icanlookatitforhours!"
"工作好有意思耶！"尤其是看着别人工作。
16)Godmaderelatives;ThankGodwecanchooseourfriends.
神决定了谁是你的亲戚，幸运的是在选择朋友方面他给了你留了余地。
17)Whentwo?scompany,three?stheresult!两个人的状态是不稳定的，三个人才是！
18)Adressislikeabarbedfence.Itprotectsthepremiseswithoutrestrictingtheview.服饰就象铁丝网，它阻止你冒然行动但并不妨碍你尽情的观看。
英语经典搞笑励志语录1
1. Do not, for one repulse,give up the purpose that you resolved to effect.——Willian Shakespeare不要只因一次失败，就放弃你原来决心想要达到的目的。——莎士比亚
2. A man is not old as long as he is seeking something. A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams.——J. Barrymore只要一个人还有追求，他就没有老。直到后悔取代了梦想，一个人才算老。——巴里摩尔
3. You have to believe in yourself . That's the secret of success.——Charles Chaplin , American actor人必须相信自己，这是成功的秘诀。——美国演员 卓别林. C.
4. One's real value first lies in to what degree and what sense he set himself.——Einstein Germany一个人的真正价值首先决定于他在什么程度上和在什么意义上从自我解放出来。——爱因斯坦德国
5. The important thing in life is to have a great aim,and the determination to attain it.——Johann Wolfgang von Goethe人生重要的事情是确定一个伟大的目标，并决心实现它。——德国诗人、剧作家歌德
6. If you wish to succeed, you should use persistence as your good friend,experience as your reference, prudence as your brother and hope as your sentry. ——Thomas Edison如果你希望成功，当以恒心为良友，以经验为参谋，以谨慎为兄弟，以希望为哨兵。——美国发明家爱迪生
7. Dare and the world always yields.If it beats you sometimes, dare it again and again and it will succumb.——W.M Thackeray大胆挑战，世界总会让步。如果有时候你被它打败了，不断地挑战，它总会屈服地。——英国小说家萨克雷
8. The unexamined life is not worth living.——Socrates混混噩噩的生活不值得过。——苏格拉底
9. Happiness, I have discovered, is nearly always a rebound from hard work. ——Grayson我发现，辛勤工作的报酬几乎总是幸福。——格雷森
10. Living without an aim is like sailing without a compass.——John Ruskin生活没有目标，犹如航海没有罗盘。——罗斯金
英语经典搞笑励志语录2
1. There is no such thing as a great talent without great will - power.——Balzac没有伟大的意志力，便没有雄才大略。——巴尔扎克
2. Our destiny offers not the cup of despair, but the chalice of opportunity. So let us seize it, not in fear, but in gladness.——R.M. Nixon命运给予我们的不是失望之酒，而是机会之杯。因此，让我们毫无畏惧，满心愉悦地把握命运。——尼克松
3. Fear not that the life shall come to an end, but rather fear that it shall never have a beginning.——J.H. Newman不要害怕你的生活将要结束，应该担心你的生活永远不会真正开始。——纽曼
4. Gods determine what you're going to be.——Julius Erving人生的奋斗目标决定你将成为怎样的人。——欧文
5. Will, work and wait are the pyramidal cornerstones for success.——Louis Pasteur意志、工作和等待是成功的金字塔的基石。——法国化学家巴斯勒
6. All that you do, do with your might; things done by halves are never done right.——R.H. Stoddard做一切事情都应尽力而为，半途而废永远不行。——美国诗人斯托达德
7. An aim in life is the only fortune worth finding.——Robert Louis Stevenson生活的目标，是唯一值得寻找的财富。——史蒂文森
8. Only those who have the patience to do simple things perfectly ever acquire the skill to do difficult things easily.——Friedrich Schiller只有有耐心圆满完成简单工作的人，才能够轻而易举的完成困难的事。——德国剧作家诗人席勒
9. Try not to become a man of success but rather try to become a man of value.——A. Einstein不要为成功而努力，要为做一个有价值的人而努力。——爱因斯坦
10. You have to believe in yourself. That's the secret of success.——Charles Chaplin人必须有自信，这是成功的秘密。——卓别林
